Monday, July 21, 2014

Crush Zone

According to an article I read years ago, crushes are supposed to last for four months, at most. If you exceed this set period of time, you have most likely fallen in love with that person.

The thing is, I don't think that's true. I've had crushes that went beyond four months, reaching years even. But, I've not fallen in love with one of them. And, I probably never will. You see, I believe we need to know someone, at least to a certain degree, before we truly and completely fall for them. We need to get a sense of who they are as a person. We need to understand at least a portion of them. We need to have something to grab hold of.

But, crushes are just that. Crushes. More often than not, they're people we don't even get to talk to. They're just faces that pass us by often enough to be noticed. Characteristics we've drawn from small, insignificant gestures from a long ways away (because, let's face it, all of us become a bit stalkerish when it comes to our crushes). Personalities we made up. Images we daydreamed about.

We know their names. Their age, maybe. Their schedules. Their favorite hangouts. Hopefully, not their home address. Despite all these information, we don't really know who they are. And, that's okay. Because, deep down, we don't want to know who they really are. We're content with the ideal person we've made them up to be in our minds.

We don't want to get to know them. Not really. Because if we do, we'll realize they're not who we thought they were. They're not really our crush. They're nothing but the face to the perfect person we want for ourselves. And, compared to the image we've formed in your minds, they come nowhere close.

So, as much as we blush and squeal and get giddy when they're around, we don't go close enough to get to know them. Because they'll just shatter the illusion. So, we keep our distance and watch and imagine and pine. But that's it. And, in doing so, we outline the Crush Zone.


Yeah. So, the thought just came to me when I was hit by a question that has been directed at me millions of times ago.

"If *insert my crush's name here* returned your feelings and asked you out, what would you say?"

I've always said I wouldn't agree to it. I didn't know why, but I just didn't want to. Then, it hit me. Crush Zoned. It happens. Or, at least it happens to me. Anyone else?

Anyway, just like that, I have the plot for my next novel already mapping itself out in my head. Now, I just need to get my lazy self to actually start writing. ^^,

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Seth Alary

There's this man I knew from a long time ago. And, I'm quite certain you know him, too.

I can't say much about his physical appearance. There wasn't really much to say about it. He had a nondescript appearance- a common face and an unimpressive build. He looked so common, so part of the tapestry that I don't remember much about it. But, that's okay. Because I remember him not for what he looks like but for who he is.

He is that guy you never gave much attention to but was someone you could always count on. He's that selfless dude who would always put your best interests before his. The one who'd give up on his chance at achieving his dream just so he could help you meet your idol or something equally superficial.

He's the idiot who doesn't know his own self because he's so busy minding what others want him to be. He's the one who writes his parent's aspirations for him in his yearbook instead of his own. The one who has learned to ignore his own desires in favor of fulfilling that of someone else. The one who pleases everyone but himself.

All these because he's afraid. He's afraid of disappointing others. Afraid of not being good enough to meet their expectations. So, he loses his self - his own dreams, aspirations, opinions. He becomes who everyone wants him to be. Because, he thinks that when he achieves that then everyone will be happy. That he will be happy.

But, he won't be. He'll never be happy. Not through the way he chooses to live his life. Because he can't please everyone. He can't meet all expectations of him. He will disappoint some people. But it's not because he's not good enough. He is. He just needs to be his own person. To realize who he is and not who people want him to be. Because the key to finding happiness is finding one's self.

So, he needs to stop worrying about everyone and start worrying about himself. He needs to choose whose opinions matter and whose don't, to understand who are important to him and who aren't. He needs to follow his dreams and be true to himself.

I know all these because, at one point in my life, I was him. So were others. And, sadly, so are many others still.

His name is Seth Alary- that small part in all of us who fear being a disappointment and wants to please everyone.

Have you met him yet? Have you said goodbye? Or are you holding on to him, still?

*A product of Prompt # 205 of


So, here's a tagging game i got from my instructor's blog post [ONE MOVIE (From Director Joni Fontanos)]. It took me a while to answer all the questions since I tend to forget the specifics of the movies I've watched but here are my answers. Finally.

1. One movie that made you laugh.
* Ang Tanging Ina. I mean, for what other reason would you watch an Ai-Ai de las Alas movie if not for a few laughs?

2. One movie that made you cry.
* Four Sisters and a Wedding. I couldn't help it. I have four siblings and the truth in this drama-filled movie resonated deeply with my heart. In other words, relate na relate ako. Grabe!

3. One movie that you loved when you were a child.
* I don't know why, but the movie that first came to mind was Titanic. Weird, right? What was I doing watching something like that as a child? What happened to my childhood.??
I haven't had the chance to re-watch the film so I don't remember much of what happened. But, I still don't get why they couldn't have both survived.

4. One movie you've seen more than once.
* I honestly don't like watching movies I've seen before. It only irritates me since I remember exactly what would happen next. But, 3 Idiots is an exception. I have a feeling it will continue to touch my heart no matter how many times I watch it.
I liked the movie so much that I watched Aamir Khan (Ranchodas Chanchad)'s other movies. Among these was Taare Zameen Par which is about the struggles of a dyslexic child.

5. One movie you loved, but were embarrassed to admit.
* Burlesque. People get the wrong idea when I say burlesque.

6. One movie you hated.
* There are honestly too many to mention. But, this list consists mainly of Filipino movies that are either too cliche or feature young actors that can't act.

7. One movie that scared you.
*None. I'm easily taken by surprise but I don't get scared.

8. One movie that bored you.
* 127 Hours. It's pretty much about how this guy survives after getting his hand stuck under a rock during one of his adventures. He had to cut off his arm. It was bloody but boring. I did keep remembering this one episode from Happy Tree Friends where a similar event took place.

9. One movie that made you happy.
* Up. Because Russel is so cute! And, the absurdity of a flying house via thousands of balloons amuses me.

10. One movie that made you miserable.
* My Neighbor's Wife. It was simply idiotic. I didn't get the twisted logic they used for justifying cheating on their spouses repeatedly. It was just plain stupid. I don't even know why I watched this.

11. One movie you weren't brave enough to see.
* None.

12. One movie character you've fallen in love with.
* Jack Sparrow. Why, you ask? Well. He's a pirate!

13. The last movie you saw.
* My Name is Khan. Khan, from the epiglottis. It was awesome! And, true. It is sad how there is discrimination brought about by religion- something that should propagate love.

14. The next movie you hope to see.
*I don't know. Anything will do, I suppose. I like watching series more. Speaking of, I can't wait for Sherlock, Series 4.

I hope you guys continue the game by copying the items above and answering them. Post them on your status update, blog them, or how ever you wish. After doing so, tag a friend from any social media and hope these people play along.

Thursday, July 3, 2014

7 Reasons to Turn Down a Marriage Proposal

Because not every man who gets on one knee and pops open a velvet box gets what he wants. Here are some reasons why.

1. You don't love him.
I am a firm believer of marrying for love. And, while a marriage of convenience may be tempting, I've written, read and watched enough love stories to want it for myself. Besides, if you're going to be shackled to someone, it might as well be to someone you won't try to kill because of something trivial like snoring too loudly, or putting too much syrup in his pancakes, or watching too much football, or waking up too early, or laughing too heartily. Useless stuff like those. The point is,no matter how trivial these things are, if you spend a long enough period of time tolerating them, you'll find your annoyance grow into irritation and develop further into hatred.

2. He doesn't love you.
There are lots of reasons why men propose. He may do it because he loves you. Or maybe because he knocked you up. Or because you're rich. Or your parents are rich. Or his visa expired and he's about to get deported. If he's popping the question for reasons other than being completely and hopelessly in love with you, why say yes?

3. Timing.
Marriage isn't something you simply do with the right person. You have to do it with at the right time. Career. Family. Opportunities. There are a lot of things that could crowd up in your life that just makes it hard to start this serious a commitment. If you feel like there's too much happening at that moment in your life and you can't possibly add one more thing, then postpone. Being with the right person at the time is as devastating as being with the wrong person at the right time.

4. You're a bum.
Neither one of you has a job. You don't have your own house. You have no source of income. You're only hope is the kindness of your parents and the depth of their pockets. You'd have to be astronomically stupid to say yes.

5. You don't like the ring.
A bit superficial? Maybe. But still. Why would you agree to marry someone who doesn't even know you enough to know the type of ring you'd want to have around your finger for the rest of your life? This isn't about him getting you the most expensive ring on display. This is about him knowing and understanding who you are.

6. You're being pressured.
It's perfect. The candles. The flowers. The ring. The man. But, there's the crowd. And, in the moment following his question, all you hear is the fast beating of your heart and the drawn breath of the hundreds of people around you. You feel pressured. You need to say yes. But you shouldn't. I've always hated people who use a crowd to get you to do what they want. So, resist. Besides, if it was meant to be, you wouldn't have noticed other people. You should have had been drawn to him and nothing and no one else.

7. You're just the practice dummy.
He's the love of you life. He's kneeling before you. He has a ring in his hand. And, he just uttered the four magical words. But, he's not really asking you. Of course, not. Because you're not the girlfriend, just the best friend. And, he's just practicing on you. It's just role play. Don't get carried away. You'll only hurt yourself.

*A product of prompt # 296 of